How God Wounded Me to Show Me His Will
“See now that I myself am he! There is no god besides me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal, and no one can deliver out of my hand.” (Deut. 32:39)
“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” (Prov. 27:6)
I grew up playing baseball. In fact, I think I started around the age of 5. It was something I always enjoyed and loved to do. I can honestly admit that I never hit very well, but I did have a good arm. If I was going to make anything out of playing baseball, then my arm would be my ticket. But God had other plans.
Starting in the 10th grade, I began to have some strange, but significant injuries. I strained a few muscles that year. In the 11th grade, I pulled my hip muscle. In 12th grade, I strained my ulnar collateral ligament (UCL). That’s one of the ligaments in your elbow. I strained it so badly that I could not turn a door knob for two months.
Then I went to Junior College where things got worse. I red-shirted my 1st year. However, the summer before my 2nd year began, I broke my right foot. Stupidly enough, I played 6 innings on it. The devastating thing about this injury is that I pitched probably better that summer than at any time in my life. My third year in JUCO, I tore some knee cartilage running in the outfield. Further, I developed bursitis. The pain was unbearable. I wore a knee brace and still had some functionality, but I decided to throw in the towel. Baseball just wasn’t for me. I didn’t seek much medical attention for this final injury. I quite frankly was tired of X-rays, MRIs, rehab, etc.
The knee got a little worse before it got better. My knee cap would slide out of place a little if I didn’t have a brace. I actually had to walk with a little bend in my knee as well, but I got around.
Now that baseball was out of the way, what was I to do with my time? I started to play guitar to pass time. I connected with some great people in at Shepherd’s Field Church in Martin, TN (formerly known as “exciting” Southside Baptist). They had contemporary worship and a different kind of service than I had ever seen. At this time, I began to actually seek God and connect to him.
In the summer of 2006 at MFUGE, I decided that “God, whatever you want”. I mark that as the start of my time in ministry. During this process, God revealed to me that the reason I had all of these injuries is so that I could serve a greater purpose in this world. The Lord literally KILLED that identity I had clung to; he DESTROYED the hope I had in a vain imagination. It was the process of killing the Old Man.
In the summer of 2007, at the CALL prayer gathering in Nashville, TN, God healed my left knee. I went into the prayer tent. As I walked up, they put anointing oil on my forehead and hand. It was clear. When they prayed, my knee was instantly healed! Hallelujah! In fact, the clear oil they put on my forehead turned RED when they prayed! People were freaking out at the red cross on my forehead. I didn’t understand what was happening, but someone took a picture of this tremendous event! The picture of this is below!
From that day until now, my knee has had ZERO problems! I can walk, run, and perform other activities without any pain. It was truly a miracle.
The journey God has led me on hasn’t been anything I could have imagined. I am thankful to have met all the people from those years until now who helped encourage me to seek God’s will. I am thankful to have met all of the people who God used me to touch.
I think my testimony is a reminder that God will strike us physically if there is a greater purpose for us to be alive. I am thankful that He did this to me, even though at the time it was not pleasant. I can look back and say that they were self-inflicted wounds to some extent, as I could have stopped at any point and asked God for His will.
I am thankful to God that He showed me the reason all these things have happened. It was part of His plan to deliver me from myself, which required a destruction of self (literally!). He saved me from my own vain imaginations. Not all suffering is because of disobedience or being out of God’s will, but it can be. Ask the Lord to show you times that you have been wounded by Him for His purposes.
“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:1)
Thank you all for participating in/being a part of the harvest.